When You Don't Hit it off With Your Kid's Teacher

Its bound to happen sometime in your kid's educational career, you get a dud teacher. Last year was Cheyanne's turn and this year is Heather's. Heather is doing well in her class, getting all A's and excelling in everything she does but I just don't like this lady. I have tried to be understanding since she lost her husband last year, her mother in November and had two surgeries for carpel tunnel syndrome this school year but it just isn't working. At the beginning of the year we signed up to volunteer in class and since I have been unemployed I have volunteered at the kids school for wherever they need help. I even spoke to her when I was signing up, she never called. In November I spoke with her again letting her know I was available if she needed help since she was having surgery and family problems, she never called. Today she sent home the report cards with a letter stating how challenging it is to with 33 students and NO volunteers. Really? When you go to talk with her about your kid's work it is like some BIG inconvenience and she never returns a smile when I see her in the morning. I am also a little perturbed about Heather's report card, Heather received all A's and all O's except for one N in organization. This one N disqualifies her from the Honor Roll which I think is BS. her desk being messy (that is what "needs improvement") should not disqualify her. She should be recognized for her academic achievement. Oh well, at least this school year will be over with soon and hopefully next years teacher will not be so petty and unperson able.

Unfriending

I have always had a love hate relationship with new technology and the Internet and facebook are no exception. On the one hand the Internet and facebook has allowed me to contact and keep in touch with people who at one time in my life meant the world to me but on the other hand its also allowed me to find out just how little you might mean to someone else. I have recently been "unfriended" by one of my facebook friends and to be honest it really hurt. This isn't just someone I went to school with or an acquaintance but was my best friend for almost 20 years. She was the one close girlfriend I had through out my life, the maid of honor at my wedding, the one friend that no matter how long it had been when we got together everything just fell in place again and she didn't even say "goodbye" or anything like that. She just simply stopped sending me Christmas cards, was awkward when I did see her and then just unfriended me like I never meant anything at all.
     I guess its just me, I've never been able to simply cut off someone from my life. If you are my friend I am fiercely loyal to you forever, even if we lose touch for awhile there is always a place in my heart for you. In fact I took this email test today and it fit me like a T, this is me.
" 31 TO 40 POINTS: Others see you as sensible, cautious, careful & practical. They see you as clever, gifted, or talented, but modest. Not a person who makes friends too quickly or easily, but someone who's extremely loyal to friends you do make and who expects the same loyalty in return. Those who really get to know you, realize it takes a lot to shake your trust in your friends, but equally that it takes you a long time to get over if that trust is ever broken."
I know what happened in my head, she divorced my other best friend of 20+ years and is making a new life with someone else and doesn't see me as a part of her new life anymore, but in my heart I don't understand it at all. We talked when the divorce came up (because all three of us had been such good friends for so long) and this shouldn't be an issue. I still talk to her ex all the time but never took sides, never wanted to. Her daughter spends almost every weekend with us and is best friends with my girls but she's just gone. I wish I could be like that, because then I could just cut it off too, cut out that little piece of my heart she took up residence in but I can't and well I don't know what else to say. Not a very good ending to a not very good story but....

Things I Will Miss

I have a really good lead on a job right now, probably the best lead/ chance I have had in over 1 and a half years and I am hopeful but trying really hard not to get my hopes up too high (sometimes it is crushing to not get it). I started thinking though of the last 2 1/2 years of "vacation" and there are definitely some things I will miss about being home so I am writing this poem in my head as I type. Forgive me if it doesn't come out right.

When I go back to work I will miss having alone time and reading lots of books.
I will miss school awards, spelling bees and class parties.
I will miss the alone time I have by myself to read or write or just sit and veg.
I will miss picking up my girls from school everyday and holding their hand while we walk to the car.
I will miss taking a shower at noon on those days it is 20 degrees outside and only 60 in the house.
I will miss games of Mario Cart after homework is done and having a good dinner ready at 5:30.
I will miss playing my I Pod at top volume and singing out loud because there is no one to hear.
I will miss a lot of stuff just off the top of my head and I am sure there is more that I just haven't said.
When i go back to work I will miss a lot but the time I've had with my kids, well I'll miss that the most.
CF 1-14-11

Cold

It is funny how there are different degrees to being cold. There are days when I am cold at 68 degrees and then there is the cold of the last few days where 40 degrees when the sun is shining is actually kind of nice. Today is one of those days that I think I am just going to be cold no matter what. I turned up the heater from 60 to 65, I am wearing a beanie cap in the house and my feet feel like they are going to fall off. Even the sun looked cold to me today so I snapped this picture and named it Cold Sunshine. It is kind of silly to personify a heavenly body but to me I think the sun is cold and needs some mittens. Anyways I just wanted to whine for a bit and now I am going to go read a book under the blanket on the couch and cuddle with the dogs. Hopefully I will thaw out.

Gotta Love Them

Well it is starting again, the holidays are here. I hate holidays because it brings out the worst in my family. Every year since about 1985 I have bounced around from house to house on Thanksgiving and Christmas spending a few hours here, a few hours there, stuffing myself until I am sick on 2 or 3 different turkey dinners and coming home exhausted and not really happy. I have had to drag my own family around with me since I got married and had kids and I know it is hard on my poor hubby. Sometimes I wish I lived out of state like maybe Vermont or Florida because then it wouldn't be expected that I attend every bodies holiday function. It is just so frustrating. What frustrates me the most is that even though I spend my whole day in the car (especially now since we are an hour away from everyone) nobody is satisfied with the amount of time I spend with them. My mom has her dinner at noon so we will leave here at 10 am then visit, eat, help her clean up and leave to go to Grandma's. Then we eat again at Grandma's, visit and drive home because we need to get home reasonably early because it will be 27 degrees up here and the dogs will be left out while we are gone. Every year I do this it becomes more of an ordeal and every year I listen to someone tell me that next year they will just go out to eat because they want to have their dinner earlier and I can't be in two places at once I want to scream. Next year I think I will stay home and do my own thing, maybe if i have enough "balls", until then here goes another Thanksgiving whoopee oh and Christmas is coming to, I can't freaking wait.

Beyond My Comprehension

http://worldblog.msnbc.msn.com/archive/2008/09/12/1382073.aspx

I just read an article on MS NBC regarding an "honor killing" that happened approximately six weeks ago in rural Pakistan. I really thought I was going to throw up after reading this, not because of the graphic detail but because after reading it I was stunned. Usually I am pretty numb to the goings on of the world, I read the news, watch the news etc. with a cool detachment, every atrocity seems to blur together BUT sometimes they don't. This article did everything, gave me the chills, made me cry, made me sick, everything.

How can a father do that to his own daughter? Does he grieve afterwords? Does he miss them? How? Maybe I can't see it because I was blessed by many great men in my life, my father, step father, grandfathers, husband and many wonderful male friends are how I have based my beliefs. I know people can be ugly, I have seen my fair share of yucky people in my life BUT this takes the cake.

They call it "tradition", they call it "honor", I don't think so. I think its sick and I've seen honor before this isn't it.

Ahhhhhh! Gotta Vent Read at Your Own Risk

So I was honest, the unemployment form said "did you start any school or training?". I checked yes, don't ever do that with out consulting a professional. The EDD in their infinite wisdom have not sent me my check and called me for a phone interview so they can determine if my going to school will affect my ability to to look for and obtain employment. I spoke with the lady she was very nice BUT she asked a bunch of questions ranging from when I go to school, how many classes I was taking, how much money I have spent, am I looking for work, how can I work and go to school at the same time and then "the big one" would you drop your classes if you were offered full time employment. Patiently I explained that it is an online course, I don't have set time to finish as long as I finish this semester in a year, I do it on my own time which is the whole reason I am doing this course instead of going to Mt. Sac, blah, blah, blah..... "OK Miss Fisher we will let you know in 7-10 business days if you are still eligible for employment benefits". I am not very happy.
I want a job. I want a full time job with benefits. I want to work, I look for work, I would accept work if offered and dang it I have worked since I was 16. Shouldn't I get a little respect here? Shouldn't I get the benefit of the doubt and they talk to me before they stop my check? By the time they make their decision I will not have received a check for a month. Now, I am thankful for the little bit of money I get from unemployment but it is nothing compared to what I was getting when I was employed. Of course I want to work I can't live off of unemployment forever, we are barely making it right now.
I am so frustrated. I have sent my resume out all over the place, most people don't even send anything back. Its posted on Monster, Cal Jobs, Hot Jobs, Indeed and Career Builder plus I am now the member of all of these employment sites and more. I call people in the phone book and try to use my connections for anything. NOTHING. So I am going to school and also applying for entry level jobs in that field, hoping. The only thing I have got is the offer of a part time, temporary job that I can't start until January and will last until March.
Being unemployed stinks, I miss the purpose of waking up in the morning and the fulfilment of getting a check for a job well done. I am a hard worker and although I have enjoyed staying with the kids this summer I am jealous because they started school and now have a purpose to their day.
OK, I guess I am done. My apologies to anyone who reads this but you gotta vent somewhere and its better than on Todd or the girls. You don't have to read it ( a little late now I guess if you read this part you must of read the whole thing). I hope everything is well with everyone, love you all.

CF